Oh not another fucking dream

Oh no, back here again?

Well alright, let's get this over with.

It starts out in the British houses of parliament (naturally) where a Mortal Kombat-esque fighting game is taking place (complete with your favourite characters, black man, that girl with the huge breasts and SCORPION) and it's one of those contrived story modes where two people meet and get angry at eachother “WE FIGHT NOW!” I ignore this and head off the to exciting place.

A waiting room/classroom/whatever.

Yeah.

And I have to fill out forms! Woo-hoo! Best dream ever!

I get the gist at this point that I'm planning on overseas travel (Given what people have said to me and what's written on the form) so get this.

If you live in Australia you have to fill out one form. If you live in Australia and you're British you have to write both forms. If you live in Australia and you're British and you're black. You have to write out all three. (That's racist.)

Whatever, I punch out one of the bitch staff members and move on.

So then I arrive at my destination. Some island in the middle of nowhere so I could meet my...cousins? I have cousi- okay.

Let me try to draw this out for you...

Did I happen to mention this place was a DISASTER ZONE waiting to happen? Because it was. Faulty electrical outlets, the houses were built on SAND (you're not supposed to do that, right?) fucked up architecture with no rhyme or reason and one of my cousins (about 9) was walking around with electric ping pong paddles (I shit you not, I checked his inventory)

Oh yeah, there's kids here. Two adorable twin boy- wait a second.

A family of four including twin boys living on a remote island in the middle of nowhere? This premise sounds awful familia- no. No I'm just crazy.

Moving swiftly along, nothing fucked up happens for a while (some hillbilly comes up ranting and raving about his boat but whatever) All the while I'm freaking the fuck out because I know full well something bad has to happen here, but nope.

Except one of my cousins is staring at a cloud that looks like this. And I swear to GOD I've seen this before (complete with green lightning! No one mentioned that lightning was green here):

Hold on.

Oh no.

Oh motherfucking shit.

I got the feeling that things were about to reach a climax and something either really interesting or really soul crushingly depressing was about to happen, mostly because the last five minutes of the dream were accompanied by a fucking dirge complete with the most awful singing ever foreshadowing events (shit like dark distant towns and people dying) which was a real shame because I feel like my brain went all out on this one but I woke up before anything exciting happened. Oh well. It was all still pretty fucked up.

Did I mention never eat chocolate before bed? Also, chocolate chip cookies fucking count. And you know they count. Like oh my god who cares if it was 3 in the morning you know this shit.